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If we understand our image of ourself, this can help us, not only to understand other people,
but also examines our attitude towards other people

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Knowing self-image - understand people

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"I'm OK - how about you?

Eric Berne, in his book "What do you say after you say Hello?" looked at four ways that people's self-image can be classified. His analysis can not only help us to understand other people, but also to look at our our own attitudes towards other people. Which group do you tend to fit into? What about some of the people you deal with?

I'm OK. You're OK
Usually optimistic people who relate well to others and assume a positive attitude to their life and work
I'm OK. You're not OK
Generally distrusting and suspicious people. May be competitive and ambitious. Feel they can only satisfy their needs at others' expense.
I'm not OK. You're OK
Often people believe they are the victim of circumstances and are envious of others' luck. They may feel inadequate compared to others and may blame others for their own lack of achievement.
I'm not OK. You're not OK
There is a group of people who see little value in themselves or others. They are usually cynical, negative in their relations with others and often resistant to any form of change.


Nobody, says Berne, will ever fall completely into any one of these four categories. However, by trying to picture a person's self-image as being nearer to one or other of these life positions, we can move nearer to understanding how they think and how we should most successfully deal with them


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